Folk Routes profile

I have less use for Myspace now than I ever had, and thanks to this new project called Folk Routes, that amount diminishes daily.

Folk Routes is being described as an Anarchist networking and distribution syndicate - i.e. no ads, less bullshit, less legal grey-area. Right now it is a small group of folks in the northeastern US and the east coast of Canada (with a few exceptions) but who knows where it could end up? In the mean time, it's a great place for like-minded musicians to host music, videos, album downloads, etc in a centralized place. I will still of course be maintaining this blog and trying to figure out a balance between what goes here and there will take some work but it is an exciting new project and I am quite stoked about it. Also, my profile there has a sneak preview of a new song from the upcoming Cutoff split with Cud on it!


(the profile just says An Historic but you will be able to find info about G. Zarapanecko and other of my projects there too.)


Little Black Dots on the Air

The new full length album from G. Zarapanecko, Little Black Dots on the Air, is scheduled to be released December 30th, 2010. Album will be released for now on my Bandcamp page with physical formats to follow.

Little Black Dots on the Air is the third release from G. Zarapanecko. In addition to previous elements of modern composition, ambient and improvised music, the new full length employs ideas from drone, noise and jazz, reflecting the experience of recent live performances: (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BgsK8l_8S4 or http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JR9lD0ogsWg). Tying the ideas together is a deeply paranoid atmosphere driving all manner of the composing, structuring and performing of each layer of the album.

The album follows the course of a loosely structured narrative about small scale astronomical events within the earth's atmosphere, compromising the earth's relationship with the sun. The earth stretches orbit and axis, dead weight in the solar system, while on earth, faint singularities recondition human beings like so much circutry. But this is not a concept album, merely a reaction.

First two G. Zarapanecko albums - full length "Zaratozom and Magnus" and e.p. "Glitterdämmerung" available at http://gzarapanecko.bandcamp.com


Long Overdue

I've been largely ignoring this blog as of late, but it's mostly because I've been trying to further sustain the juggling act of late, not usually succeeding.

Some highlights of the last few months:

Broadcloth did several extremely interesting performances, including one at the excellent venue Outpost 186 in Cambridge, MA. The highlight of the recent gigs was certainly the performance in New Haven with touring group Not the Wind, Not the Flag. They performed an amorphous take on free-improvisation, offering one duo of amplified mbira and percussion, and one of guitar and percussion, that was bracing, energetic and above all agile. Our set that night was extremely minimal, focusing on a lot of microtonal interaction and subtle shifts in various musical qualities over the course of several minutes. It was some of the most challenging music that I've played with Broadcloth, and proof to me that what we're doing has some vitality to it, even playing some of the same pieces multiple times during the past few gigs.

I've been working on the accordion part of Erik DeLuca's "Four Days of Winter," for an upcoming performance at Wesleyan University. I appreciate opportunities like this to perform new music, as it often is able to give me a perspective on both writing and improvising that is extremely valuable. The performance will be at Wesleyan University on November 16th, at 6PM, further details TBA.

After the recent string of G. Zarapanecko live performances and recorded collaborations, I've settled down back into some studio recording for another upcoming album. Pieces have been in progress in some form or another since December of 2009, and finally congealed in a cohesive way, one that's almost ready for release. The album will tentatively be called "New Doom," and while reflecting some of what I learned from doing live performance (i.e. noise and shifting loops) these are probably some of the most melancholy and desperate pieces ever recorded under this alias, even while being more direct than I often am. Expect future news about a tape release from GREESE,the hybrid of G. Zarapanecko and New Haven harsh noiser Bella Reese, too.

An Historic has been on-again/off-again. I'm gearing up for the release of a split with Cud Eastbound, tentatively titled "Cutoff." The songs for my half were originally recorded this summer, and have been tweaked recently with some bits and pieces of re-recording and overdubbing. They're all still geared toward (and were written at) the piano, but have been tweaked on various levels and provided with some expanded arrangements. I've been frustrated with the process of recording this one myself, mostly because recording a piano with proper equipment is difficult, let alone with a crummy built-in mic. I wonder if a situation will ever exist where studio time is possible through bartering or some other situation that doesn't involve temporary or long-term debt? Just an ongoing thought-process.

An Historic will be playing a show on November 19th at the Neverending Books, in support of Cabinet of Natural Curiosities and World History, starting at 7:00. The following Monday, I'll be playing a show to support Squinch Owl on her New England tour this year. This'll be November 22nd at Popeye's Garage - come dressed warm or ready to drink - it'll be cold, although one or two space heaters. Also, you should dance, I hear that helps.
You can check out Squinch Owl's latest release at http://squinchowl.bandcamp.com, and if you haven't already you should. Consider donating a few bucks if you can, because Sofia has run into some car trouble already on this tour that isn't cheap.

The show at Popeye's will also be the debut of Dr. Caterwaul's Cadre of Clairvoyant Claptraps, a group that I've been playing in with Nathan Bontrager and Brian Slattery. We primarily do bastardized renditions of folk music of varying origin, although the level of authenticity has been ranging wildly to great effect when we've practiced. It should be fun.

Finally, a show with an intriguing grouping of the NHIC, known as ATLAS. Consisting of Steve Asetta on saxes, Nathan Bontrager on Cello, Bob Gorry on Guitar, Jamie Paul Lamb on bass, myself on Clarinet and Steve Zieminski on drums. Many folks within this grouping already have some kind of rapport together in other situations, and the rehearsals so far have been extremely promising. This is Saturday, November 20th at 8:30 at Firehouse 12. The 10:00 pm show that night will be Mayhem Circus Electric, with the official CD release party of the group's freak-fusion effort, "Lubricity."

busy, busy, busy.


Razorcake Review - Ephemeral Stampede

I find this review quite humorous.

Originally Posted on Razorcake: http://www.razorcake.org/site/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=23622

Ephemeral Stampede: CD-R
There are two camps of European folk-inspired contemporary music. The first include the bands and musicians who thoroughly enjoy the music of their fatherlands and wish to modernize the culture to allow greater access to the general public. The second consists of kids who listen to Flogging Molly and Gogol Bordello thinking themselves clever for being a band that pretends to have a wide worldview. I honestly don’t know which section Adam Matlock of An Historic should be placed in. He certainly seems more sincere about this music than most of the specimens I’ve ever seen. His arrangements are clever in parts and lead me to think he’s just a boy from 1930s New York longing to go back to his village in some small country that will soon become assimilated by the looming threat of the communist regime. If this is what he was going for, amazing job. –Bryan Static (Self-released)


CT Indie Review of Ephemeral Stampede

Heavily percussed and violently accompanied by accordion, one of Adam Matlock's many project is titled An Historic. He just released his album Ephemeral Stampede. It features layer after layer of his soulful voice signing over top of eastern European and Balkan influenced music. He shows that he's not afraid to get a little weird, like all of the vocal layers on the first track, Briefest Eye; but later in the album in On Brother, Can You Spare a Dime? he goes completely beyond the realm of normal songwriting, where he elicits a gypsy jazz swing tune, complete with clarinets and what I think is a washtub. Fans of Beirut and A Hawk And A Hacksaw should perk up their ears and take notice. - JH

originally posted at:


Recenter Things

Recent-er things.
I've just finished recording and mixing my half of an intended split with Cud Eastbound. We find ourselves kin in strange and apocalyptic lyrics, and instead of being paralyzed by fear we decided to work with it to some common end. All these tunes are on piano with some occasional weird production effects, but I was trying to keep it simple before the next, fully arranged thing, which is still untitled but as before is almost fully arranged and completed months before any plans to record it solidify...

G. Zarapanecko is going live, on occasion, first at the August Uncertainty Music Series, as a joint set with Carl Testa, along with a set by A Split Psyche, and later Popeye's Garage on the 19th of August. This will also mark the only show of my group with Nathan Bontrager and Gabriel Bolaños, the Blackthorn Cataclysm, which is a strange and unique variety of rock-based improv. Everyone plays drums at some point. G. Zarapanecko is hard at work on some collaborations (collAberrations?) with some local noise artists, with results to be recorded or performed some time soonish - stay tuned for updates.

Finally, the debut disc from The Erasmus Quintet, recorded live in performance at Firehouse 12, has been released, and is available for download and ordinary purchase here:http://music.nhic-records.com/album/erasmus-quintet-serious-folly. The Erasmus Quintet has had some neat things said about it by the press - my take is Steve Reich on potent hallucinogens, a variously demented, driving and energetic drumless ride through the inner-workings of counterpoint. Also released on NHIC records is another group recorded that same night, Mayhem Circus Electric, featuring a strong core of the NHIC performing original compositions in the vein of better funk-influenced jazz-fusion. (less with the watery synths, more with the jittery rhythm section.)

More to come, as always.


Tour Blog YAY!

Tour blog or something, almost entirely un-proofread so bear with me.

It was my first tour, it was Mallory's last, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, etc. etc. I'd had a few brief but intense hangouts with the kids from Mallory thanks to a random series of occurrences instigated by The Official Suckers when they were last on tour in the states, and had only a few random encounters with them afterward, but somehow I knew we'd be compatible touring buddies, and I was right. My only worry was that I'd never done this before and that I wouldn't be able to adjust to the trappings of touring, but it wasn't too far removed from my traveling days (in which I wore the same pair of overalls to, and past, any ordinary expectations for a garment, slept on floors or vertically in buses, etc.). I traveled with Niko, Justin and Andre of Mallory, as well as Haley, a current(?) Hampshire student who I'd met at various shows in the valley.

Our first stop was in Brattleboro, where the gig we'd gotten had fallen through just a few days before we departed. The idea was that we'd busk to make up a bit of gas money and take some valuable practice time, during which I learned some Mallory tunes (I had the honor of trying to sing Sofia Albam's part on "The House You Were Raised In," which was pretty difficult.) and during which Mallory learned a few of mine. That set up a pretty good dynamic for the rest of the shows we played, ensuring that at least one person in the audience could sing along to the other's material. Brattleboro is a cool town, which I had for some reason never been to before - it reminds me of Northampton circa 1993-ish, before various chains and franchises had started to move in, and the tremendous hilly-landscape of the downtown strip was fun to navigate. But it was a Tuesday, and there weren't a ton of folks out walking that night, so we didn't do too well. Finally we called it in, spent the little money we made on a beer special at the Brattleboro Co-op, and decided to go camping. Of course, the first place we found to do so was a cemetery, where a sign said Active Sporting permitted. The grounds were huge and we found a quiet corner near a rail-yard to pitch tents, build a small fire and chill out before the drive to Portland the next day...until around midnight, when the police rolled up, informed us that the sign actually said "Active Sporting _NOT_ Permitted" (The "not" had faded away) and very nicely asked us to leave. It was probably the least unpleasant police encounter I'd ever had, mostly based on the fact that the first cop reminded me of Mr Magoo and the second cop actually drove her cruiser into a grave by accident, which we both swore never to talk about again. Rather than pay 11 bucks for a campground and try and re-pitch our tents in the dark, we decided to make the drive that night to Portland. Along the way, we stopped at a gas station - I had started to fall asleep but was woken up by Niko who told me there was something I HAD to see. In my just-woken haze it looked like a fairy careening around the canopy of the gas station, until Haley named it as a Luna Moth, some enormous lime-green creature with about a 5-inch wingspan. A local drunk named Joe (apparently a regular at that gas station, since the attendant was calling him by name) was trying his damnedest to catch it, which he managed to do quite gently given his vigor. He held it still long enough for a few of us to get pictures, and then walked inside the convenience store and accidentally(?) set it loose. The attendant simply shrugged as she grabbed the broom to try and corral the moth back outside, as though Joe set large nocturnal insects loose in the store on a regular basis.

We made it to Portland at about 4AM the next morning, at which point Justin, Andre and I choose to try and catch a bit of sleep at the top floor of a hospital parking garage. Niko and Haley went to go exploring Portland and catch the sunrise, which I was altogether too exhausted to go along with, so when they came back around 7:30, we all switched - Haley and Niko tried to sleep for a bit and Andre, Justin and I went to a greasy-spoon diner to get a little something to eat, which was in hindsight a terrible idea. We all felt pretty queasy afterward, but strangely sated. We killed time for awhile, then tried to find Coyle St, the house that we were playing the show at that night. Once we did, we went busking at the local Farmer's market. Portland's Farmer's market is truly epic, taking up a full block of an enormous sidewalk, and we did extremely well, then took a walk around with one of Coyle St's former residents, Ariella. We found some food, then Ariella took us to this dilapidated dock that seemed to be entirely constructed of burnt timber, which made all of us a little nervous; but it was a sunny, breezy day and we all enjoyed the time spent relaxing before the show. At some point along the walk back, the tour had a name - "Champagne the Pain Away, 2010," a coded reference to a Cud Eastbound song which only meant for us that we'd try to drink a bottle of cheap sparkling wine on every stop of the tour. (This didn't last for long, once we crossed into Canada where the champagne was half as strong and all the alcohol was twice as expensive.). Armed with the cheapest alcohol on tour we descended upon Coyle St for an awesome show. If you ever hear that the Pattercubs are going on tour, check them out and fucking book them. They're awesome, loud folk-punk with violin, bass guitar, banjo, mandolin, a really sick inventive drummer who plays trash as well as a kit and lots of three-part harmonies. They played a great set that set the mood for the night really well. My set got people dancing, which set in motion the theory that Portland, ME has an unhealthy obsession with acoustic punk, and when Mallory played people were moshing and crowd surfing, which proved the theory pretty well. The show closed with Glade Swope, a truly unique individual who played an hour+ of solo thrash at low volumes accompanied by a rhythm track on CD. Not sure what else to say but the dude seems to be something of a local legend in Portland, totally consumed by metal yet wearing a baby-blue Hawaiian shirt. a living contradiction. Look him up, cos' I know you don't believe me.
We had a hell of a ride ahead of us the next day, so we woke up early to make the drive quickly and coherently. All of us had discussed our "story" for the border crossing in order to avoid customs/taxes for performing in Canada, and we had both mailed CDs across to avoid that becoming an issue. Again, this was one area where Mallory had some previous experience, so I deferred to them for the inspiration, though since the car was registered to me I did most of the talking. Aside from border guards taking issue with and confiscating pepper spray that was labeled "defensive spray" and not "bear spray," (though the ingredients would've been the same,) we crossed without incident or much delay. We drove about 1 1/2 hrs to Fredricton to pick up our CDs, and then two hours north of there to Moncton to play an outdoor show in a skate park for some really enthusiastic folks. We were more than a bit exhausted and were considering skipping the Moncton show (our hosts in Fredricton told us that Moncton was the heart of Nazi sentiment in New Brunswick, which made me glad i'd brought steel-toed boots, but thankfully we didn't encounter any of that.) On account of not realizing the time-zone shift, we were a bit late and missed the first act, but we got to see Josue play, the guy responsible for putting the show together. We ended up getting to see him play that night and the following two, in Fredricton and in Halifax, and got to hang out with him and his roommate Gumby after the show, which was the last night of Champagne the Pain Away in practice, if not in theory. It was a fairly low-key evening, and we got the chance to recoup a bit.

The drive between Moncton and Fredricton was comparatively short, so we took most of the day to lounge around. I was itching to cook, so I used the kitchen at the Galley, the house where the show was that evening, while Haley and the boys took a walk around Fredricton with Carolyn, one of the residents of the Galley. The show was small but enthusiastic - we played with Story, Cud and Mogli, who all of us knew from their tours in the states just a few months ago, and it was like a beautiful reunion show. The crowd was small but almost everyone knew the words to every song, so there was a raucous choir behind almost everything. The folks at the Galley were quite welcoming and they're one of the cleanest, most organized punk houses I've ever seen which some might take as a backhanded compliment but I mean genuinely.

The day after that, Halifax, only five hours of driving. It is impossible to state how stoked we all were, and once we pulled up to the Orphanage and saw Ryley sitting out on the steps we all started screaming in a way that must have scared most of Halifax. We had arrived in the middle of a scavenger hunt and after being nearly tackled by Rosie when her team arrived I was roped into joining midway - the remainder of the challenges included sewing a Harbour Water fest patch onto an article of clothing (mine remains on my shorts in what was obviously a rush-job), "making total destroy" out of a set of cardboard condos representing the encroaching gentrification of Halifax, and having our team quickly consume a Faxe, a local, extremely potent beer. This took us forever since we all stopped outside of the liquor store to come up with the cash for the beer, and the folks inside wouldn't let one of us buy it unless all of us could present ID, so we had to devise a backup plan that caused us to lose the scavenger hunt. Still, lots of fun and a great way to see a small part of Halifax literally minutes after arriving. The show got started a few hours later after an enormous vegan meal, and it was a series of transcendent moments. I got to see a lot of bands live that I had only heard compressed myspace recordings of, and got exposed to a few bands that I'd never heard of before. All in all the show was extremely well booked and sequenced, although the highlights for me were definitely the riotous duo of Carrot and Sweet Potato, singing some incredibly energetic murder ballads, the mosh pit that started during Ants and Anchors' set (playing some truly incredible tunes), hearing the latest configuration of the Official Suckers playing "Straight Kids Playing Dress Up" which damn near brought me to tears, and the aptly named "One-Hand Orchestra," which picked up on Mallory's final song, which included about a dozen people, myself included. The energy was really riotous, Garlic Fingers (a local snack) were thrown, nearly blinding someone, faces were punched, etc etc etc. It was basically a series of peaks that just kept intensifying, and I was really, really glad to be a part of it. After the last band, Buy Nothing Life, played, we all hung out for a few hours in the adjacent parking lot, fueled on by scotch and homebrewed beer, and had an intense series of brutally honest conversations that brought me up to speed with everything going on between the folks in Mallory, almost everything going on in Halifax, etc. After that, the course of the night seemed to make a lot more sense to me. After a Newfoundlander named Larry drunkenly stumbled over and acted creepy for a few minutes, I was able to call it a night and feel almost completely fulfilled.
The next morning, our party split. Andre and Haley went with Story and Cud to their home in PEI, while Niko, Justin and I chose to stick around Halifax for a bit longer. We spent the next two days in various configurations wandering the city with residents and friends of the Orphanage, including Rosie, Ryley, Rowan Bee, Kelly, Tucker and Tay (saw Jake a few times in passing). I got my first tattoo (a stick and poke), drank some great beer from a local brewery called Propellor, and lost my heart to the city and the folks we were hanging out with. I hesitate to gush and make a fool out of myself in this venue, but it was truly, truly wonderful to see old friends again and meet so many great new ones, busk with some new folks and eat some great food. It was also REALLY hard to leave for so many reasons, the least of which was the double shift waiting for me after the 15+ hour drive.
And that's about it. I'm back in New Haven, facing a brutal 45-hr work week next week and occasionally smiling so widely for reasons no one around me will understand. I promise, y'all, I'm not going insane, and let this blog be the best I can do to explain myself.


Post epic-show comedown, again...

Many of the times I've said the title of this blog post, it is in reference to a house/basement/DIY show, something a little more ragged around the edges but overflowing with heart, soul, and all that goodness. Last night was very different, but a complete success on pretty much every part (which is good because a lot of people put a LOT of work into it, which I witnessed over the course of the past week.)

I'm of course referring to the Big Room/Uncertainty Music collaboration that occurred last night, showcasing dance/movement by Rachel Bernsen, music by Carl Testa, Taylor Ho Bynum, Matthew Welch and Broadcloth, my trio with Anne Rhodes and Nathan Bontrager. Broadcloth performed Elastic, Carl Testa's interactive electronic environment for improvising musicians, which was basically like improvising on a really, really tricked out sonic playground, and was loads of fun to perform. As an improviser doing my own work and working with others, I've found it difficult in the past to interact with electronics in a meaningful way; thankfully, Carl has the background as both an improviser and an electronic composer to make such a thing work (and we triggered/recorded our sounds with Wii-motes, which Nintendo should be paying Carl tons of money for.) Broadcloth also performed a short improvisation which took us in a different direction than we had gone in the past, partially due to the fact that we had a bigger room and different spacing than our normal semi-circle setup for the small rooms and stages we've played before. I'll be curious to see if that direction persists the next time we get together.

I also had the chance to perform Taylor Ho Bynum's "Three Fables from Borgel," based on a text by Daniel Pinkwater. These were some really bizarre, tremendously entertaining (to perform, and judging from what I could see of the audience's reactions, to listen to) songs that really captured the spirit of the absurdist/surrealist children's book they came from, which I'm now determined to check out. Working on these over this past week with Anne and Taylor was really a treat, and I hope opportunities to play compositions like this aren't so few and far between in the future.

Matthew Welch accompanied one dance piece by Rachel, and performed a solo improvisation on his own. Suffice to say he's a monster, the bagpipes have never ever seemed cooler and I'm further building my case to eliminate electric guitars after hearing the extended techniques bagpipes are capable of, and the good old-fashioned shredding when necessary too.

Rachel presented four pieces, one accompanied by Welch, one with electronic sound and light by Carl, one accompanied by a really impressive cornet score by Taylor and the last featuring live bass guitar by Carl, voice by Anne, and a choreography that incorporated them both. I've started to develop an appreciation for dance after spending the last two years accompanying for modern dance classes (albeit for much younger dancers, at Neighborhood Music School), but I'm far from being a connoisseur; I did really appreciate Rachel's choreography in each of those contexts, recognizing some aspects of improvisation in them that I can immediately relate to as a musician. The fact that so many of these pieces were interdisciplinary at heart was part of what made them so engaging to me and to some of the folks I spoke to during the intermission and afterward. There was a nice turnout, especially for an event of this nature, and it seems as though there were a lot of people who were in my shoes as of two + years ago, surprised to see such a strong avant-garde art scene in New Haven surviving and, dare I say, flourishing.

And on top of all that, I met Anthony Braxton. Like I said, biiiiig comedown...


Broadcloth at Take Your Time

Next week, May 28th, at the Big Room in Fair Haven, CT, Broadcloth will be performing as part of a killer lineup in the premiere installment of a new series called Take Your Time. Below, I'll post the official writeup, but Broadcloth will be performing a structured improvisation alongside live electronics by Carl Testa as accompaniment to one of Rachel Bernsen's dance pieces which are the focal point of the evening. I will also be performing with Anne Rhodes and Taylor Ho Bynum on Bynum's "Borgel Songs," a short song-cycle.

It looks to be an incredibly diverse evening of new music and art, and a fully multi-media experience. Hope to see you there!

The Uncertainty Music Series and The Big Room introduce Take Your Time, an interdisciplinary performance series, featuring new works by Rachel Bernsen, Carl Testa, and special guests.

Friday May 28, 2010 at 8pm

The Big Room - Erector Square 315 Peck St. New Haven, CT, Building 6W, Studio D

Tickets are $12. Seating is limited. Reservations are recommended. For reservations email: thebigroomnewhaven@gmail.com

On Friday May 28th, a consortium of New Haven-based artists will launch a new semi-regular performance series called Take Your Time. In a co-presentation of The Uncertainty Music Series and The Big Room, choreographer Rachel Bernsen and composer Carl Testa will offer the New England premieres of new and recent work in their first shared evening. Rachel will perform three pieces, each a unique collaboration with musician/composers including Taylor Ho Bynum, Anne Rhodes, Carl Testa, and Matthew Welch. Carl will perform a new composition for light, sound, and movement, and present a new piece for trio and live electronics featuring the collective improvisation trio Broadcloth. Bynum, Welch, and Broadcloth will also be performing short improvisations and original compositions.

Rachel Bernsen “has the ability to make even the most simple things completely fascinating. She is an amazing performer and a compelling artist” (Michael Helland, Curator, Dixon Place). Her most recent projects create dialogues between sound and movement; where the musician’s physical presence and role is equally important to that of the dancer, integrally connected to the flow of time and the organization of space. Her work has been presented at such New York City venues as Dance Theater Workshop, Danspace Project, Roulette, Dixon Place, and Issue Project Room. At Take Your Time, Rachel will perform three works: User in collaboration with Anne Rhodes and Carl Testa, Glimmer Glint Glisten (with a live score by composer/cornetist Taylor Ho Bynum), and Singular Present, a collaboration with New York based composer and bagpipes player Matthew Welch.

Carl Testa is a composer and multi-instrumentalist, most notably as the bassist in composer Anthony Braxton’s septet and 12+1tet with whom he’s performed throughout the US and internationally. Testa’s own compositions have been described as “engaging and unique” (Bruce Lee Gallanter, Downtown Music Gallery) and “human music, with varied emotions and sublime moments” (Richard Kamins, The Hartford Courant). For his performance at The Big Room, Testa will use interactive electronics and computer-controlled lighting equipment to create dynamic environments for both movement and sound. www.carltesta.net

The evening will feature additional performances by Taylor Ho Bynum, called “one of his generation’s top avant-garde figures” by The New York Times; the trio Broadcloth, a unique instrumentation of voice (Anne Rhodes), cello (Nathan Bontrager) and accordion/recorders (Adam Matlock) that plays from notated, graphic, embroidered, and textual scores in addition to completely spontaneous pieces; and Matthew Welch, a virtuoso bagpipe player and composer "possessed of both rich imagination and the skill to bring his fancies to life" (Time Out New York).

The Uncertainty Music Series www.uncertaintymusic.com is a New Haven, CT based creative music series that has been presenting concert events since September 2007. The goal of the series is to provide a venue for local and regional artists that may not have the opportunity to present their work elsewhere. The Big Room is a new studio and performance space providing the New Haven area with a much needed, low-tech platform for interdisciplinary collaboration, experimentation and research in dance and performance.


Coming VERY soon...Ephemeral Stampede!

I've mentioned this on and off over the past few months. Ephemeral Stampede is an album that has been mostly written and arranged for almost two year now. I had intended to record it all nice-like with a real studio and some session musicians/friends filling out the sound, but after something resembling a complete financial breakdown, I had to bite the bullet and self-record the whole thing. I'm actually quite satisfied with the turnout, and the re-done arrangements reflect what I've been hearing in my head after performing many of these songs live and solo in the last 9 months, which is quite different from the Kurt Weill-influenced cabaret sound I was originally going for. If some sugar-parent wants to give me a great deal of money to re-record these closer to my original vision, I would not say no. But I'm ready to move forward as well, having completed another full-length of An Historic material that I would like to record soon-ish, too (which budget concerns will probably force me to, again, self record and release, as much as I'd like to save my computer the strain of burning endless copies.) So that's that...hoping to self-produce a limited run before tour begins, so that I've got something more current that reflects a little more of the direction that An Historic has gone, since producing CDs is awfully expensive if you don't have the money for an upfront investment. And of course, it will be cheap on Bandcamp too...

Creative Commons License
Ephemeral Stampede by An Historic is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.
Based on a work at gzarapanecko.bandcamp.com.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at http://www.myspace.com/adammatlock.

An Historic Mini Tour with Mallory (help!)

This might just be the cutest thing ever.

In June I'll be hitting the road for about a week to go on a small northeast tour with Mallory, ending up in Halifax for the Harbour Water festival put together by lots of sweet punks up there like Ryley of Fairy Boy and the Official Suckers. This is my first tour and I'm a little nervous but mostly just excited. I'm lucky to be traveling with Mallory who are not only nice musicians but sweet people as well, so I have high, high hopes.

As you can see, we could use some help in Brattleboro, in New Hampshire, and in Portland, as well as the first date in Moncton, New Brunswick. I've never been to any of these places as a growed-up person, so any help anybody had with venues, contacts, etc would be really sweet. You can contact me through this here myspace thing, or via email at weillwedance at gmail dot com.



A Long Time Coming

The limited free-run of G. Zarapanecko’s Glitterdammerung was reasonably successful. It was free for 12 days, and got maybe 30 downloads total, plus random links on French and Finnish music blogs (though I haven’t a clue if there was anything resembling feedback about the album.) I’m hoping to do a physical tape release soon, with details forthcoming. I’ve also begun early recordings of a new, noisier G. Zarapanecko release, getting back into exploration of synth programming as well as electroacoustic processing. We’ll see where this ends up, many, many months from now, I’m sure. Now the trouble will be finding some poor, interested suckers who’ll actually pay for the digital release now…just another example of me shooting myself in the foot with promotional ideas...

I nervously sent out copies of the first An Historic demo, “My Czerny,” to zines like Razorcake and Give Me Back a while ago, hoping not to get one of those bullshit reviews where the reviewer doesn’t even spin the disc, or stops it after the first song, etc. To my surprise, not only did I not get one of those reviews, but I also received something resembling praise at points – I won’t bother trying to summarize, so here:

My Czerny: CD-R
This thing had “Beware! Most likely contains ambient and indiscernible home recordings!” written all over it, mostly due to the ambiguousness of the packaging and the lack of much information besides song titles. Instead what we get are some “actually pretty pleasant and tuneful home recordings,” mostly of the, uh, squeezebox/accordion variety, I believe. About half of the handful of tunes here are single-instrument pieces, while the rest feature additional instruments and overall excellent vocal work. Got no idea what it is they’re actually singing about it, but they’ve convinced me, whatever it is. Most likely not gonna make any Razorcake reader’s top ten lists, but was an atmospheric enough run on a night when the rain’s coming down and the wind’s howling around the house. –Keith Rosson (An Historic)

I’ve been busy for awhile recording new An Historic material. My plans to get something finished by an upcoming show fell through, or so it seems, but the project is around the 75% mark, which is relatively exciting. The material here is from Ephemeral Stampede, all home-recorded demos of an album I had written almost two years ago and planned to record in a real studio before everything fell apart financially. This might be the last we hear of this material, or I might some day, much later, re-record these tunes in such a way that more closely resembles my original arrangements. But for now I’m relatively satisfied with everything so far, and just two tunes and a handful of random tracks to finish up. Meanwhile I’ve just about finished writing the material for another An Historic release that will be recorded hopefully in May if all goes well – I’ve been practicing and performing most of these songs solo and I’m going to keep them closer to the solo-arrangements on the recordings, which is a different approach then I’ve taken with An Historic material in the past, mostly because the fidelity of my equipment makes solo recordings sound pretty awful.

An Historic performs April 3rd at the Unitarian Universalist society sometime between 6:30 and 8:00 for a benefit dinner for the Connecticut F.A.D.G.E Fest . (Feminism, Autonomy and Diversity of Gender Expression). April 9th is a performance at the Fucking Discovery Zone with Story, Cud East, Squinch Owl, Tyler Bussey and New Year’s Revolution – 7:00 PM and donations for touring bands. Finally, April 10th is the first Juggler’s Meadow Festival of 2010, with tons of bands and lots of other various stuff going on too – zine stores, free market, workshops, food, etc. Details on that last one TBA.

After some finagling and jumping through hoops, Passing a Penny, the song cycle based on Rob Talbot’s poetry, is definitely still on. More details to come as we approach the May 8th performance.

Finally, after a brief hibernation after our concert at the Stone, Broadcloth will be bouncing back soon. Again, details still forthcoming.


Glitterdämmerung - Available Now and Free for the next 7 days

Upon the transition of time today, the sky is alight with the first trickles of the metacontext, which will ramp up steadily over the course of the next 22 months.

Glitterdämmerung, the new EP of electro-acoustic ambient music by G. Zarapanecko, is among the earliest missives of this new aeon perceptible by human hearing. All sounds wrestled digitally from the aethyr and manipulated into something resembling "composition," "improvisation," and "melody." Shape suggests narrative suggests structure, but suggestions can be ignored.

Glitterdämmerung is now available at this web portal and will be a free download for the next 12 days. Your exposure is recommended prior to the full flood of glitter at twilight on the eve of 21 December 2012.

Creative Commons License
Glitterdammerung by G. Zarapanecko is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License.
Based on a work at gzarapanecko.bandcamp.com.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at http://www.myspace.com/adammatlock.



It's a bizarre feeling to have my hands in so many projects, each engaging me in a completely different way. Playing in other people's bands is fun figuring out how to engage with other material, usually in a very different style than material I write myself.

Playing with Broadcloth Sunday at the Stone was really a treat for us as players. We had a small space with decent acoustics, and an occasional radiator hiss to punctuate some of our more composed moments. It's still kind of a blur to me but I felt exceptionally present at the time. Thanks again to everyone who we blackmailed into coming - Kinan, a student of Nathan's, was kind enough to record video of the concert (he also recorded our set at Audubon Strings on January 30th, on Youtube and many of my pages), and that will be up shortly. Expect something like a coherent release from Broadcloth in the very near future, too.

Then Monday and Tuesday saw me playing solo sets. Monday was at Cafe 9 as part of the Beatnik 2000 series. What I saw of the bill was interesting and eclectic, with spoken word and some other music. I had to leave early because I had work in the morning and a big day lined up on Tuesday; the first show I ever booked with Fairy Boy and the Official Suckers and Mogli who were touring from Halifax, NS. This was a show that I had been having weird prophetic dreams about in the two weeks. I won't attempt to explain them but they were different from my normal anxiety dreams about upcoming concerts, which usually involve me struggling continuously to get to a concert on time through nightmarish turns of events (kind of like the plot of Umjammer Lammy, the absurdist psychedelic music game on the Playstation.) Feral Flowers and The Book Slave and I rounded out the show, and it was a solid, nearly two-hour marathon of great music. I was pretty captivated by everything, and there was a great turnout, and on top of that all of the potluck food was delicious. On top of that, Fairy Boy, Mogli and the other Suckers Rosie and Thom were all sweethearts, and I had a blast hanging out with them. In a fashion quite true to myself, Jeff/Feral Flowers and I are going up tomorrow to see them play again in Leverett, MA at the Juggler's Meadow. I've got first hand info that it will be an awesome show, also featuring Providence, RI and Amherst, MA-based Mallory.

After that, I'll have an appearance as a performing guest on "The Jef Sessions," Jef Wilson's radio show on WYBC 1340 AM in New Haven, or online at The Yale Radio website, between 1-2PM on Saturday. Carl Testa will be appearing for the first hour.

It's been a busy week for me, and after Saturday I don't have anything lined up for awhile The next thing on my plate is another acoustic show I've booked at the Fucking Discovery Zone, with touring acts Story. and Cud E. who are fellow Nova Scotians playing acoustic solo folk punk. I will play along with other CT acts New Year's Revolution, Tyler/Old Hannah, and Wood Spider. A large and varied acoustic show, with flyers forthcoming. This will also be the second show I've ever played where I've not been the only accordion player - Mogli was the first, and Story. will be the second, and both make fabulous use of their instruments, just in case you should happen to be an accordion nerd like me.


What the hell I've been up to...

I'll try to keep this brief because as usual there is a lot going on:

Coming up on Sunday, February 28th, is Broadcloth's performance at The Stone in NYC. Previous gigs and rehearsals only got better and tighter, whether performing compositions or doing free improv, and it should be pretty clear with this set how much work Anne, Nathan and I have put into making this group as organic as possible. We've also established a Myspace page for the group, found here, which hopefully will be followed by something more closely resembling a webpage.

The following two days, An Historic will perform in New Haven. Monday is a brief set at the Beatnik 2000 series in New Haven at Cafe 9, which will be a shorter set. I sat in with Jef Wilson's band Schwa on that series less than a month ago, and it lived up to its name, with music, slam poetry/spoken word accompanied by hand percussion - perhaps living up to an aged artistic ideal but certainly not the sort
of thing you see often in New Haven - plus it seems to be fairly musically inclusive, evidenced by my accordioneering being booked for the gig. Cafe 9 is generally considered a dive with good music and decent beer, so it's a win-win venue all around. This usually gets going around 10 PM.

The next day I'll perform at the first show I ever booked. Mogli and Fairy Boy and the Official Suckers will be rolling through on tour from Nova Scotia, and they both represent an energetic, melodic strain of acoustic punk that is quite worthwhile. (Plus Kyle Fairy Boy describes himself as queer-panic folk, which is a better subgenre than I've heard in awhile.) Feral Flowers (aka Jeff P) and The Book Slave will also perform, and that pretty much means shit is gonna burn the house down. A truly diverse cast of musicians, all somehow contained under the banner of acoustic punk. This will be at the Elm City Infoshop (Neverending Books) at 810 State St, and the space will be open at 6:30, with the show probably starting an hour later. Vegan potluck, money for touring bands, etc.

There’s also a good chance that on Saturday, March 6th, I’ll be appearing as a performing guest on Jef Wilson’s radio show, the Jef Sessions, on WYBC 1340AM / 94.3FM. It airs between 12 and 2 PM, and I’ll be a guest during one of those hours. Again, details forthcoming.

All these An Historic appearances will be building up toward the recording of a new EP, which I mentioned a while ago but had put on the back burner in favor of other projects. I wrote four of the songs for this project within a week’s time, with two others falling out more or less spontaneously in subsequent short periods, and have been revising them slowly as I’ve learned them. The EP will contain these new original songs and one or two folk/public domain tunes I enjoy. I envisioned these songs to be as stripped down as possible, in contrast to the layered tunes I’ve been slowly self-recording that comprise the “Ephemeral Stampede Demos” project, which is meant to serve as a stopgap until a later, higher-quality recording can be produced. The tunes for this EP (yet untitled) are mostly accordion and voice, with some having drums and some clarinet overdubbed into the mix. I’ve performed two of them so far at shows, and will be trying the rest out at upcoming gigs.

The release of G. Zarapanecko’s “Glitterdammerung” is quite near, and to top it all off (since, let’s face it, who’s gonna buy it anyway?) the digital release will be free for the first 12 days. Hot damn.

Finally, after much delay, procrastination and setback, the song cycle “Passing a Penny” based on the poetry of Rob Talbot, is complete. The work is due to be premiered at the Uncertainty Series in May with Anne Rhodes singing, along with some other solo accordion compositions I’ve been slowly working at for awhile, which really came together once I got my new accordion last year. The music is best described as alternately manic and melancholic, a duality that describes the poetry (and probably myself better than I’d care to admit) quite well. Save the date – May 8th is going to be a barn burner, and it’s the first of my through-composed compositions to see a performance in over a year.

That's really about it. I ranted about the concept behind "Orchestrion," Pat Metheny's newest album recently on my Myspace blog, and I forgot to cross post it here. You're not missing much. I did so without having listened to more than one or two video clips of it, but really, finding out about the album was a catalyst for some ideas I'd been mulling over for a while anyway...check it out at http://myspace.com/adammatlock if you are for some strange reason a completist about my written word.


...and boy is my left arm tired...

blog 2/8/10

A lot to talk about: I spent the last week in New Orleans, which I'd never been to before. The music down there is great - I met up with Missa, my once and future busking partner, and brought my accordion down so we could go chasing our glory days on main streets of Western Massachusetts again; in the process, I ended up joining one of her bands for a week, featuring fabulous musicians and songwriters all - Saymus on a baby banjo that was tuned like a ukelele, Sal on guitar and harmonica, and Eli on acoustic bass guitar, with Missa playing trumpet and flute and a guy named Jason who was a whiz on clarinet and alto sax, and we were joined for one gig by Dizzy on the washboard. The music ranged from klezmer to more traditional New Orleans jazz, some old-time and swing, as well as some more ambiguous tunes written by members of the group. All in all, between busking and playing with these folks for a week, I learned about two dozen songs, most of which I still remember. I really appreciated this idea of playing accordion with a rhythm section, as there is a certain percussive quality to pretty much any strummed or picked instrument that is difficult to replicate on an accordion, especially while singing. And I have serious clarinet envy in a city like that, especially how the best players just make it look so damned easy...

I timed my return so I'd be able to see Kayo Dot play their first album Choirs of the Eye and their latest, Coyote, in full at the Stone. My full impressions go up later this week, along with an interview with composer/guitarist Toby Driver, at the Avant Garde Metal webzine, but suffice to say it was extraordinary, presenting two sides of what is very clearly the same band exploring different sonic terrain. It makes me extremely excited for the upcoming release of "Coyote" - and interesting to note that I saw live performances of both this album and their last release, "Blue Lambency Downward," prior to the album's release, which is an interesting perspective to get as a fellow composer-performer, trying to figure out how to realize complex music in live performance. Plus I'm a huge fanboy, so it's really a win win.

February 26th is the digital release of G. Zarapanecko's latest ep, Glitterdämmerung. Finally got the mix to a desirable level and have nearly finished the artwork. There might be a bonus track lying around for the taking too. Enough said for now.

Almost finally, and I forgot to add this to my page, but I'll be playing an acoustic show at the Elm City Infoshop on February 15th, with Brook Pridemore, Liv Carrow and possibly others.

Finally, Broadcloth. Just prior to leaving for New Orleans, Broadcloth had an exceedingly joyous and contemplative set at Audubon Strings on January 30th, which included Gabriel Bolaños Chamorro's "Big Crunch Singularity" and compositions by each of the group. I talked this gig up endlessly, and I would dare say it lived up to the hype, while being extremely different from our debut gig. I want to wait to make any judgements until I have the audio, which Lou Guarino Jr. graciously recorded. Kinan Faham took tons of pictures and took video of the whole performance. You can see a clip here, or search Broadcloth on Youtube for the rest:

Last night we played a set at C.O.M.A., the Citizen's Ontological Music Agenda, and it was a very different beast than last week's set. We played a set entirely of improv, in contrast to the highly composed playing of last week's set, and the result was quite energetic - it didn't hurt that the first set, the duo of Dave Ross on guitar and Shayna Dulberger on bass, was similarly full of energy, and something one might call extreme pointillism, which put us in a good mood. I like all kinds of crowds but this was the first that was having serious uncontrollable physical reactions to the music, which was also good inspiration to an improvised performance. The structure of the night is that two acts each have a set, followed by an open session during which series curator Blaise Siwula pairs off groups of participants from the audience and from the performers, so I got the chance to do some free improv with players I haven't met before, including Dave Ross, Blaise on Alto Sax, and folks whose names I didn't all catch. Anyway, the series is a great and supportive environment for new music, and while we were competing with the Super Bowl, it was more gratifying to know that the people in the audience either really wanted to see and support new music (or just really hated football). At any rate, expect a digital release from this group, and probably, gasp, a myspace page.


Gigs this Weekend

Friday, I'll have a brief spot playing for the Neighborhood Music School's winter dance concert. This starts at 7PM. The dance itself is called Hubba Bubba (I think) after the gum, which should give you some idea of what a troupe of young modern dancers can do with such images. It's actually quite cool, and I've crafted a semi-composed piano solo to accompany the piece, called "Xylitol."

Later that night, a big spectacle of the NHIC at Cafe 9, with the Brett Bottomley Group in some configuration, Mayhem Circus Electric and the Elm City Guitar Quartet +3. We'll be attempting to renavigate some pieces from Crash, and try a few new ones too. I've become about as zen as I can about playing acoustically amongst 4 electric guitars but there will be a PA at least. It promises to be a raucous set and the press has seemed to enjoy the NHIC live and on record in the recent months.

On Saturday my trio Broadcloth will perform. We've put a lot of work in between this gig and our last, and we'll be playing some fun new compositions in addition to some free improv. We'll be playing two sets and will be accompanied by two guests in the second set (Steve Zieminski on percussion and Gabriel Bolaños Chamorro on guitar). The first set will include the debut of a new electro-acoustic composition in spectral music by Chamorro written especially for Broadcloth. $5, starts at 8PM, at Audubon Strings, a room full of violins, violas and cellos and one composition by Bontrager plans to take maximal advantage of that fact. Hoorah.


A Declaration

A Declaration
I have often spent a lot of time, effort and brainpower into musical ideas that never make it past the conceptual stage, most often because of lack of resources or know-how - and sometimes a good idea just takes to the backburner because what seems like a better idea is at the forefront of my consciousness at the moment. Case in point - An Historic's full length record, "Ephemeral Stampede", has been written and arranged almost completely for the better part of last year, and the only thing that's stopped me from taking the album past the level of complete pen-and-paper abstraction has been the fact that I'd decided some time ago that I was going to record it in a nice studio. Obviously I don't make enough money to manage this, and the economy has made this less, not more likely since that decision was made; so some odds and ends, pieces of harmonies, chord progressions and lyrics have been sitting around, physically or digitally, waiting to be engaged again...

So finally, on Sunday, I got sick of that. Even though, as usual, I'm up to my ears in various projects right now, I decided that I'm going to self-record and release demos of most of the songs, so that they exist in some tangible form, even if only to serve as a placeholder for a future session. The first tune I did (which is nearly complete) is Ephemerer Ansturm, the title track of the album (only in German...) At the height of its activity, I had 12 tunes lined up for this project, 10 original and two traditional (including Brother, Can You Spare a Dime which I've recorded before), with something resembling flashy arrangements or the closest equivalent my abilities can provide. Details forthcoming, but this will probably exist as a CDR, and maybe, just maybe, if someone likes the demos enough to send a couple grand my way, these will be redone at a later date, somewhat closer to the way they were originally conceived. Expect updates and an MP3 quite soon.


Upcoming Performances and Broadcloth Audio @ Myspace

Gearing up now for a flurry of performances in the next few weeks, then a brief vacation, then a bunch more after that.

Saturday, January 16th:

The semi-annual NHIC review will be happening at Neverending Books, with two sets and two different groups. I'll be in the second set. Starts at 8-ish, with admission by donation, etc.

Friday, January 29th:

with the Elm City Guitar Quartet +3. CD release party for Crash at Cafe 9. Everything starts at 10 with the Brett Bottomley Group (Brett plays marvelous things on the Chapman stick, and is an NHIC affiliate.) At 11, the ECGQ +3 will be reunited for some raucous rock-ish fun, and at midnight, Mayhem Circus Electric will perform some weird grooves (just don't call it fusion) with some guests, and minus keyboardist Nate Trier.

Satuday, January 30th:

Broadcloth will perform two sets at Audubon Strings in New Haven, CT - one solo, and one with some guests. Details forthcoming, but it's in a room full of stringed instruments, and hey isn't resonance neat? New track from my Myspace player is from our debut gig. (http://www.myspace.com/adammatlock)

Sunday, February 7th:

Broadcloth will perform a set at ABC no RIO for the COMA (Citizens Ontological Music Agenda) series, a long-running improvised music series in NYC. We'll do a set, another group TBA will do a set, and then there'll be an open jam that everyone will likely participate in, so bring an instrument if you're around.

Friday, February 12th:

An Historic. Some kind of acoustic show at the Elm City Infoshop/NEB. It's all very nebulous, really.

Sunday February 28th:

Broadcloth will perform a set at The Stone in NYC, holy shxt I know right? $10, 8PM.

Tuesday, March 2nd:
An Historic, The Book Slave and Feral Flowers support touring Nova Scotians Mogli and Fairy Boy and the Official Suckers for an acoustic punk-ish show - a really diverse and talented lineup - at Elm City Infoshop/NEB. Details/flyer forthcoming.

And breathe...


Lyrics from My Czerny

yeah, that's right, people post lyrics and stuff don't they?

Briefest Eye:
Can I confide in you/ Loose threads on all my seams
Tell all my troubles to you/ if that is what you please
there's no need for concern/ I will survive this phase
but all I have these days/ is worry

About the war machine/ God and guns and government
the will that claims it's heaven-sent/and the victims on the television news
but if I choose/ two channels down
there's actors paid never to frown

Ain't got it bad/this storm will pass
Ain't got it bad/didn't finish last

I'm sure my day will come/when I get my reward
I'm sure if I was drowning/ I would get dragged aboard
I don't think I've been wronged/ don't feel I've been deceived
but for some good news I would be relieved

Ain't got it bad/this storm will pass
Ain't got it bad/ didn't finish last

Four stools down you spill your drink on the man
he cries angry, runs at the streetlights
to demonstrate scorn, the bar stands in unison
the mood is tense, I creep for the door
I just want you to take me away
but the hope's not enough,
it's not enough

If we could hitchhike together
we'd get far, I swear we'd get far
to the north or the west, wherever the trucks go
we'll find others, make them drop everything
if you'd spilled your drink on me
but the hope's not enough,
it's not enough

If this plan doesn't work I'll take responsibility
buy us bus tickets home, or maybe we'll find a car
drive out to nowhere and hunt for our food
but I'm getting ahead this is all presupposing that
I was the one that you'd spilled your drink on
but the hope's not enough
it takes a little more
the hope's not enough, it's not enough.


Excuse me
I'm still in this city
Ignored all the warnings
Instead thought that I'd sit here pretty
and cry to myself
as I tried not to drown
It was a spell of bad planning,
I thought If I strapped in
I'd easily manage to
wait out the worst of the
storm that took the crown

It all went downhill from there
You'd better believe I was underprepared
for the sheer isolation you can't overcome
when your only friend is a gallon of rum

I needed to eat but instead I ignored it
I tried to sleep but got no reprieve for it
If I'd left to go somewhere welcome and warm
then it wouldn't be me and this storm

Swore that I'd never get stuck here again
but it's just a cycle
It's just a cycle
and now I'm falling in
Wrote my regrets upon my skin

but the lessons that you think you learn from the past don't always sink in

It's been seven
years, lost possessions
some frantic replacements
and chronic obsessions
It was just a storm
But it's one that I'll not soon forget
If I'd the chance to revisit
I'd follow the wise ones
and get while the going was good
no I wouldn't stay
to get my feet wet

But it's easy now to look back
easier still not to cut yourself slack
when you find- yourself at a fork in the road
and the path that you choose has eroded

These voices say nothing that I want to hear
but somehow they know just what - I - fear
I can drink one more glass, they'll continue to moan
I can get it together or die here alone

Somehow I've found myself back here again
I know it's a cycle
it's just a cycle
but the walls are paper thin
to disengage would be a sin

But the gift of hindsight never benefits
you when you need it
and a life can be forgotten when you
can't see past your shroud

and the lessons that you think you learn

(Not like you're gonna steal my crappy words but it's protected under a creative commons non-commercial, attribution share-alike license, so just ask.)